A jones. A craving. A desire. Do you ever get a jones for anything- say a particular food? It seems vain and selfish thinking out it, when so many people in the world have so little. It is so easy to have a craving and be able to satisfy it in this country. Most of the time I am not sure if I can satisfy a jones. For coffee? Sure. There are lots of places to get a really good coffee. For something sweet? Not so much. I am always disappointed, never being able to find anything good at a local shop or bakery. For something salty? If I get a small bag of chips, after the first three chips I regret it. They do not taste right, and are very flat in flavor. No, I get a jones for something from time to time then as I consider what I can get to assuage it, the feeling passes. Its usually not worth the substitution to just have something similar to what would really be good.
Ah, but I have found a local joint that has an item that I DO get a direct jones for and can be satisfied (apologies to B.B. King). Remember wavy French fries? Crispy on the outside, potato still flavorful on the inside? The perfect vehicle for an assortment of condiments, the waves/ridges hold on to what ever is being conveyed. They do them exquisitely at my local joint, and carry a wide variety of things to ingest them with. It is my secret pleasure to get away in the middle of the afternoon and sit outside, had an order of the fries and a pint of beer. Usually only for half an hour, and I dont get to do it very often; but when I do it is a very good break from the ordinary.
While we are at it, what I miss about being a grown up:
· Thinking that there is no good BBQ to be had outside of KC or Memphis (depending upon where I was living at the time), needing a big lives blues fix and then tossing some clean clothes in the back of the truck (it had a camper shell) and going. Eight to twelve hours? No problem. Stop and over night at a camp ground if needed. Usually just do the time and be there.
· Being naked. Stepping out of the shower and just being naked. All day if possible. Hanging around the house, napping, reading, watching something on the tube. Alone or with a current companion.
· Hope. Listening to loud reactionary music of any genre, thinking about possible recreations, and living in hope. Casual, unafraid, unconstrained hope.
· Dreaming. Not knowing that the future is a closed road. Dreaming of what one can be, wants to be, hopes to be.
· Not knowing or caring what my creatine, HDL and LDL are.
· Dancing as crazily, long and loud as I want. Some local joint, live music, big skirt and tight white tee-shirt and not feeling silly.
· Being pretty. Youth really is wasted on the young.
· Its someone elses job. Being a leader, the one who knows and understands what is necessary, the one who is expected to pick up the slack- whether a pol, parent-teacher asso. member, neighborhood watch, etc. Someone elses job. Not mine. Who me? No one needs me yet.
· Open road, figuratively and literally.
This afternoon Husband is back into his teaching-administration-work cycle and the kids are both in school full time now. I had breakfast this week with several other moms who had kids starting school, and facing empty daytime houses. These moms are also very well educated women; looking forward to the change and a chance to be productive in ways they have not been for a while. We have discussed redesigning minivans and SUVs in ways that are supremely more functional (why dont they do focus groups with moms?), such as a redesign on the rearview mirror, sliding doors on SUVs, and lots of small things that would make autos so much more efficient and functional. I said, as I have before, that the Gates foundation needs to fund a think tank of this most under utilized resource- the previously stay at home mom- and draw on a diverse set of education, experience, and pragmatic vision to write a variety of opinion papers and designs reflecting life in the U.S. Instead of thinking of them as out of the loop, people need to think of them AS the loop.
Anyway. I digress.
Amid the coming stretches of time with no people demanding my attention, I can focus and finish many projects. Ill also have time for the small get-away to satisfy the jones for those fries. A jones for my husband. Or just a jones for a long, uninterrupted nap.